Pyromancy is telling the future from flames. And we can now predict with confidence that (in spite of the storyline in the books), Mance Rayder won’t be coming back from the dead now that Melisandre has roasted him over a crackling fire.
Why not? Because in both the book and the TV show, the characters have multiplied to the point that they are unmanageable. In order to wrap up the storylines, Benioff and Weiss need to kill off as many characters as possible. After all, new characters are constantly being introduced, and each show is only an hour. Tell Melisandre to get her torches ready..
In the meantime, my requiem for Mance includes a few favorite quotes from Mr. H.’s interviews on the occasion of his demise…
Q: How does burning someone alive work from a production standpoint? What’s required?
A: Well, a) don’t panic, b) make sure they’ve doused you in nonflammable liquid, and c) make sure you’re a good two feet from the first flame. But when you have someone as elegant and luscious as Melisandre, sometimes you just surrender: “Oh, go on.”
Yes, now we know the real reason Mance refused to bend the knee. The prospect of the red-hot redhead Lighting his Fire was just too tempting to resist. And remember Mance’s promise to light the biggest fire the North had ever seen? Clearly, he and the pyromaniac Melisandre (who puts the “bust” in combustion) were made for each other.
I could be wrong, of course. Maybe Mance’s Desire for Fire was the result of too much time spent
filming in Iceland living in the frozen North beyond the Wall. I quote his interview with EW:
Q: What was your best memory of working on the show?
A: It certainly wasn’t freezing my nuts off in Iceland! Those were bitter days. The people I worked with were so great. The technical people, the camera, the sound, the costume people. It was huge, actually, the work they did behind the scenes in Iceland, to make it bearable for us to do our work.
And then there is this little gem from Esquire:
Q: Most of your scenes are with Kit. How did you two find a rapport? And what did that relationship have to be to make the show work?
A: You do have to connect with the other actor. It reads if you don’t. You know, I have a goddaughter, and there was a moment where she was telling me about the Mance pieces [in the books]. I kept saying, “Don’t tell me, don’t tell me.” But they couldn’t help it because they were in love with the story. That was, until I convinced my goddaughter that we were going off piece and Jon Snow was my lover. I don’t know what she had read, because I didn’t read the books, but I told her HBO had taken it another step further [laughs].
Mr. H., it seems, has the makings of a True Fan, since he has succumbed to the temptation to rewrite the show, shipping Manly Mance and the Beauteous Jon. This would have been a brilliant master stroke (heh heh) in the writing of the show, and I’m thinking of starting a Change.org petition to convince Benioff and Weiss to do a few flashbacks showing the REAL nature of their relationship.
After all, look what he told the New York Times:
I could not agree more that the show needs an injection of sexy roMANCE. Not the constant titty and booty calls which at this point seem obligatory and perfunctory, but something with real heat. Maybe they could base it on Mance’s memoirs.
So what do the flames predict for Mr. H.’s future? For one thing, he’ll be starring as the wicked seducer Claudius opposite Ben Cumberbatch in the National’s production of the original game of thrones, Hamlet. I think it’s safe to say he’ll be getting some action.
For more on Mance’s Barbecue, check the calendar for April 12-14 at ciaranhinds.eu.
Well, Linnet, perhaps you will be inspired yourself to write Mance’s memoirs.
His real memoirs would probably be very political, all about uniting the Free Folk. But inquiring minds want to know what happens when he takes the furs off (besides being roasted).
Participating in an event where one can assist in removal of furs would be interesting.
You said it! I’m not a fur person, so I would be anxious to strip them off him as soon as possible 🙂
Some time ago I made a reflection on GoT and our favourite actors (Mr. H as “reality” and Mr. A as “hypothesis”); as you say the amount of characters in that series is enormous (or as Elle Driver would say gargantuesque) I supposed that the total amount of words they’d have to declaim would be about an A4 sheet in 16 courier new with double interline space. I mean, not even a quarter of a soliloque in a theatre play. it’s like calling Alain Ducasse to cook you an omelette; it will surely be the best you have ever eaten, but it’s just an omelette. 😀
But in the case of Mr. H at least while he was cooking an omelette he had fun with the interviews, priceless!
Love the Ducasse comparison. How I would enjoy tasting one of his omelettes 🙂
The GoT books are over the top with characters. I found it difficult to keep track and finally gave up in the most recent book.
As for Mr. H., I think he is taking the right approach to the show 🙂
“Puts the “bust” in combustion”. LOL! But really, burning his remains? When Mr H passes he should be preserved Lenin style in a glass casket where we can pop in and look at him. Hot men are hard to come by and we can’t afford to discard them just because they’re a bit dead.
Except that I heard Lenin was not doing so well. He has a fungal infection or something. I fear we will have to make do with our memories, our DVDs and the wealth of photos at ciaranhinds.eu, but NOT FOR A LONG TIME YET.
Fungal infection? Pfft, they have creams for that. But I agree that Mr Hinds must not even consider predeceasing us. I’ll expect him to support his grieving TV son at my funeral.
I never got into GOT. Will you keep watching now that it’s CH-free?
You know, I am asking myself that question. I have a lot of issues with GoT. I dislike gore, and although I like sex, the sex in the show is too… sexist. No gender parity in terms of nudity, and lots of gratuitous scenes. Many of the plot lines bore me, but I do enjoy Tyrion and Varys. I also like Roose Bolton, wicked man that he is 🙂 I met that actor when I was in London and saw a play he was in with Mr. H. He’s great!
I never got into GOT. I read the first chapter of the first book on the recommendation of a friend. It made no impression and didn’t feel it was worth the bother. Watched the first episode of the TV show and felt the same as I did about the book. As I get older I realise how little time I have and how much there is that’s worth reading and watching so I have to be very discriminating. So many lolcat videos I still have to see.
I completely agree! Do not waste time on stuff that doesn’t appeal to you. As for GoT, I started reading the books before the show ever happened, and found them strangely hypnotic, if overlong. But eventually they became so turgid and lengthy that I lost patience (and lost track of the story lines).
Thought of you Sunday night and had a giggle when Mance said “Fuck my pride!” It *definitely* should have been “Fuckety-fuck and double-suck my pride!” =)
I thought the season premiere was great, not least because of the Mance action. Couldn’t remember from the book, having been years since I read it, whether it had followed the book or not. Bad fan with Armitage-clouded memory that I am, I didn’t remember whether Mance was actually burned, or just threatened with it in the book, and if he had been, whether Jon had mercy-shot him.
I can’t remember either, but I don’t think so. In the book he begs and screams for mercy when he is burning. I really hated it that Mance acted that way, but then it turned out later that it was not really Mance but Rattleshirt who was transformed by a spell or something. Mance has a continuing storyline but I’m not sure it amounts to much. I suppose we’ll see when the next book comes out.
I’ve not watched 5.1 myself, but I’ve seen all the clips from it. It is a little sad that Mance’s only extended scene is his death scene. Finally they give him something to do, and it’s being roasted!
I just watched “There Will be Blood” last night. Was he in it? I could’ve sworn that was him.
Well for my part, I’ll lose interest if they kill off Jon Snow. I’ll probably still watch just to see what the dragons do, but my viewing will be half-hearted. I’d normally say there’s no chance they’d kill off such an important character, but then I think of what happened in Downton Abbey.
On the other hand, I thought for sure they couldn’t kill off Joffrey so soon. He’s so detestable, how could they kill him off already? I fully expected him to grow up, wreak more havoc, then finally get killed by a dragon or Arya. Or both somehow. Or Arya, Sansa and a dragon. Something spectacular. Poisoning is lame.
Yes, Mr. H. was in TWBB. He was the right hand man of Daniel Day Lewis’ character. He had more scenes but they were cut. That’s one amazing movie. My favorite line is the milkshake one, of course.
Yes, I would be more likely to just quit if they kill off Jon Snow, since he is one of the only sympathetic characters. I didn’t mind the demise of Joffrey because he was so utterly evil. I was hoping for something more spectacular too (roasting by dragon would be good) but I think he was poisoned in the books.
Oh the milkshake line was hilarious! Daniel Day Lewis’ voice was amazing…at first you don’t know whether to like him or dislike him. There’s just a peculiar quality in it. Perfect for that role.
In a way, I’m glad I don’t have to look at Joffrey anymore. Whoever played him did an awesome job. He was so creepy. Even in the earlier episodes when he’s much younger, still really creepy.
Right. The young man who had that role decided that acting isn’t for him, and “retired” after Joffrey’s death. I’m sure it wasn’t easy being Joffrey 🙂 He reminded me of that nasty, smirking Malfoy kid in Harry Potter. Except much worse.
Wow, he retired? He was so good! For me it got to the point where I couldn’t stand to see his face, and to take Joffrey to that level takes a lot of skill. Well, maybe he’s retired to become a philosopher. 🙂
Yes, I think he wanted to concentrate on his college career. He is a very unusual-looking young man, so I am sure he gets recognized a lot. It’s going to affect him for the rest of his life.
Like JHolland, I, too, thought of you Sunday as I watched Mance burn – and I was thinking , ooh, sorry Linnet. I wish there had been more of him in the series.
Me to! It was a waste to hire someone of his caliber and then give him so little to do. But I’m glad he was on the show. Since it has so many Northern Irish connections, it seemed like a natural for him!
Just how early do you get up?
LOL. At 5:30 am. I eat breakfast, check ciaranhinds.eu (not always in that order), then do my blog stuff. But I go to bed shockingly early 🙂
It must be early for you too, yes?
Any damn time you please, Mance.
You said it, Revere! Lovely to have you back 🙂
Having too many characters is never good. What will happen?
All we know for sure is that a good many of them will die this season!
well, what a waste to give him a good episode and only to kill him , pft…. of all the character crowding the series, this is the one they decided to get rid of??? honestly annoying, i also thought more could have been made of the those scenes. Sorry i seem to be in minority in finding Jon Snow s bit boring.. in that series he;s just too predictable.
I also thought killing Mance like that just got rid of all the wildlings in a an unfair way, a free people, so much more interesting than a lot of the society types populating the series. In it’s own twisted way it is becoming a bit repetitive. Mance certainly freshened things up a bit.
Hilarious though how H spoke about it in interviews 😉 It seems the right way to go about it, not too take it too seriously. I do watch it, but to me it is just a show, i like the costumes and the killing main characters but it is too OTT to be taken seriously 😉 And too many naked women in comparison to naked men and all a bit gratuitous. There is a disproportionate lack of true passion, feeling in the series. Or when there is some it takes the yawny guise of characters such as Snow. I’d much rather stick to more determined and less apologetic characters like Arya, Tyrion or Mance 🙂
Don’t want to imagine the nightmare practicalities of actually filming the barbecue 😉
I agree with you on all points. They have too many characters and story lines to allow much depth, or as you say, real passion. Kit Harington has nice abs and he’s good at the physical aspects of the role, but as you say, the character is a bit callow (and his acting never quite convinces me). I enjoyed the scene in 4.9 when the mean Night’s Watch commander Ser Alliser showed what he was made of by battling Tormund (another character who should have more scenes). But as a whole, that episode was a snooze despite the huge amount of special effects in it.
Mr. H. definitely takes the right approach by lending it a bit of humor–an element that is sorely lacking in the show. And I liked what you said about the Wildlings standing for a different social system. I suspect the Wildlings will still have a part to play, but it’s a shame they had to kill Mance off since he represented their refusal to compromise on freedom and egalitarianism.