Season 4 has just premiered in the US, but I’m still catching up on Season 3. To be frank, I am becoming fatiguée with the blatantly gratuitous sex scenes, and even more so with the torture. Still, I sit up and take notice every time Peter Dinklage comes onscreen. Or Mance Rayder (all too rare) or Jaime Lannister. Stay tuned for Friday’s post: “If Linnet Wrote Game of Thrones.”
There’s a hilarious parody of Game of Thrones out there that dubs the actors’ voices with people saying silly things, perfectly timed to their lip movements. It comes ever-so-close to making sense, but never quite does.
I noticed that the makers of this video neglected my favorite scene from Season 3, which comes when Jon Snow is taken to meet Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall. So I created my own non sequitur dialogue (with a food theme, natch) to fit the scene! Lines in parentheses are the actual lines, followed by my new and improved version.
Mance Rayder: (So, you’re Ned Stark’s bastard.) So, you like ballpark mustard .
(He learns that Jon killed Qorin Halfhand) [He learns that Jon Snow quit the Night’s Watch because you couldn’t get a decent sandwich there].
(He was our enemy, and I’m glad he’s dead.) Try a hoagie, with sourdough bread.
(They shake hands.) [They shake hands.]
(He was my brother once, back when he had a whole hand. What were you doin’ with him?) We have other ones, even green eggs and ham. What’ll you have with it?
Jon Snow: (The lord commander sent me to the Halfhand for seasoning.) Malt vinegar, and some Marmite for seasoning.
Mance Rayder: (Why’d you come here, Jon Snow?) Why d’you want to eat here, Jon Snow?
Jon Snow: (I want to be free.) I want souvlaki.
Mance Rayder: (No I don’t think so. I think what you want most of all is to be a hero.) No, I don’t think so. I think what you want most of all is to eat a hero.
Watch the original scene here.
Bonus photo: this selfie photo was tweeted by Belfast man Rob Miller. I think Rob is the guy at front right with the big axe.